"Trust Me"

For the past three months, I have had the opportunity to be stretched, broken, humbled, amazed, taught, rebuked, matured and exhausted beyond every sense of the word. Having Jess and Bev be in the States brought in a season of turmoil (for lack of a better word) that I never expected. Back at the beginning of this insane time, a pastor friend of mine informed me that this was going to be a season that was going to shape the rest of my life...if only I knew just how much. It's amazing to look back on all that's happened over this time. I had to say goodbye to so many people, have a broken foot, deal with some incredibly heavy ministry issues, as well as some stuff going on back in the States. It was seriously non-stop, and after each time of thinking that "ok, now that's over, things will be ok again" and then WHAM! But honestly though even looking back through the previous posts I've made during this time, it's amazing all that God's brought me through. I've forgotten a lot of the pain and despair I felt during a lot of those situations, even reading some of the most recent posts I've made I have to kind of remind myself what was happening that was making me cry out in such desperation. Things that we think are the end of the world, things that seem to be making life impossible, things that seem like you just simply can't take anymore, are now just things in the distant past that I've even forgotten about even though they were maybe just a couple of months or weeks ago. Even as I'm writing this, I'm still recovering from even more "episodes" of breaking and maturing that are even separate from what I would consider the season without Jess and Bev. And to kind of put the icing on the cake, I just took my last dose of Malaria medication because for the first time since I've been here, I finally got that super fun little sickness. Like I said, it's really just one thing after the other.

The thing is thought that God just knows us way too well and what we're struggling with and what we need to hear. He tends to teach me the most through when I teach others, and he did just that today. I got back from my trip to Karamoja (see other blog posts) and found out I had malaria, and today was the first time I really was able to get back to ministry. At Jinja SS, I have been teaching through the book of Ecclesiastes and today's passage was 3:1-8, the famous "Time for everything" passage. He reminded me and helped to realize that in all the ins and outs of life, God is still in control...the good and the bad. There's a set time for all that's been happening in my life and He's just having me go through this time to make me into the person He desires for me to be. I just have to continue reminding myself of that as I go through all this. It's funny because there are certain times when it's just like God is almost audibly telling me, "Just trust me", then I give some excuse or another thing I'm struggling with or unsure of and He just reiterates that over and over, "Just trust me". It's far from easy and I definitely don't have it down yet, but I'm just glad that He sends me little reminders in the midst of all the hurt, and chaos, and pain that it's for but a season and as one of my favorite quotes says, "If you want to see the rainbow, be prepared to endure the storm."