Just let it go

So ever since I came back from Sipi Falls, I've definitely been on heightened alert for things in my life that I wouldn't mind changing. I'm pretty sure, aside from the various sinful attitudes I have, one of the biggest things that I feel God is trying to drill into me is that I just basically need to lighten up. I'm always so tightly wound, and let's be honest, if I'm like this now, I'm pretty much going to die of a heart attack by the time I'm thirty because of how I blow stuff out of proportion and just take things way more seriously than I should. There have been various things God has sent my way in order to test this lesson out, and I'm going to be honest with how I've pretty much failed every single one of those tests with flying colors. Sometimes I like to write it off as a personality trait, but really I need to have joy and stop holding so tightly onto things. Even now I try to put it into the not "sin" category, but let's call it what it is...a lot of times it is that nasty little three lettered word. It's sin when you don't trust God and allow yourself to take on the martyr mentality, it's sin when you gossip about others who don't live up to your "standards", it's sin to stress out to the point that you snap at people, it's sin to allow the work to over shadow the "better thing". Oh if only I could remember that! And really it's all just summed up in another nasty word: pride. Oh what a wretch I am, but thankful that I have His Spirit living in me and the promise that He is faithful to complete the good thing he began in me. I guess it's a good thing God is one for "tough cases" because sometimes I just don't think I'll ever really get it.